Mirror Kisses

Last night Matt from WRFT and I headed down to the TLA in Philly to check out The Redwalls, The Cribs and The Kaiser Chiefs. Cribs and Kaiser Chiefs are British bands, all very tight sets, all extremely cute accents.

After bothering Erin over at Cornerstone for like 5 straight days in a row now for the interview/guestlist, it was finally time for me to check out the goodness of the Cribs.

Upon arrival there I had to ask for Spike (The Cribs' tour manager.) First of all, who the hell calls themself Spike? And why in the world did he and the security of the TLA frantically freak out when I tried to bring my tape recorder into the venue.

After a secret convention in the corner with the tour manager and the security guards the consensus was reached that my bag would be held backstage for me. Them taking my bag = Christine freaking out without her cell phone, notes and expensive white linen jacket.

We walked into the Redwalls set. The singer seemed to be making eye contact with the girlies in the front row and the pants the band was wearing was tighter than mine that night.

I jumped into the bathroom quickly for a quick piss before the Cribs set. The bathrooms in the TLA are super small. Oldhead lady in front of me was decked out in a Kaiser Chiefs t-shirt and British girl behind me seemed normal until she decided to stick out her tongue dangerously close to my face to ask if I saw any bite marks.

At this point in time, I peed my fastest pee ever and beelined it to the front of the venue wondering why British bands attract such fucking weirdo fans.

The Cribs came on the stage and completely rocked my face off. The drummer, Ross Jarman, was intensely beating the shit out of his drums and standing up to play the set at times. After breaking a snare drum, vocalist/guitarist Ryan and vocalist/bassist Gary broke out into an impromptu cover of the Shirelle's "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow" while someone ran on stage to replace it.

Their set was seemless and hard hitting the entire way through. The songs "Hey Scenesters" and "Just Another Number" poured out of the speakers while cute girls danced along with their scantily-clad bodies swaying to the Cribs's pounding melodies.

It was finally 10pm so I headed backstage to collect my bag from the mysterious man named Spike and make my way to the Cribs dressing room. On the way there, random boy from Kaiser Chiefs looked me up and down. I gave him a look that said "no, I am not a groupie. I will not:
- kiss you
- fuck you
- suck your dick.

Found my way to dressing room. Drank beer. Smoked cigarettes. Had a nice little chat until scary tour manager Spike came up there giving me the evil eye that equals "get the fuck out student radio girl"

Anyhow, you need to see the Cribs live. After 10 minutes Ryan was already bleeding all around the mouth. While interviewing them, Ryan explained that he had badly split his lip while in Europe one night and he never got the proper stiches. Ever since then, his lip has just been splitting open during performances most likely due to smacking it against the mic.

He doesn't do it on purpose and it's not just a gimmick. Yet when I asked why he still had blood all over his face like 20 minutes after their set he told me that people tell him it makes him look more like a rockstar. And then added, "Maybe I'm just keeping it on to impress you."

After interview/ getting station ID's I headed back down to catch the latter part of the Kaiser Chief's set. After coming from back from behind backstage I was molested by a groupie.

She had shorts so tiny her bum was hanging out. And she was wearing an extremely low-cut white t-shirt with no fucking bra. And to make matters worse she was completely drunk off her skank ass.

I got to enjoy a lovely screaming conversation with her:
Groupie: Are you in a band?
Me: No.
Groupie: Why were you backstage then?
Me: *Shakes head and tries to move away from said groupie.*
Groupie: (Not taking the hint) Who are these guys?
Me: They are called the Kaiser Chiefs.
Groupie: Do you know who Good Charlotte is?
Me: *Winces, tries not to throw up* Gross, why would you even say that?
Groupie: So I like hooked-up with the guy from Good Charlotte like 20 times.
Me: *really feeling the beer start to come up* *pushes groupie* Go away.
Groupie: *Lights cigarette* *Looks backstage to see if she can get back there*
Me: Seriously. You are gross.
Groupie: What? You can get me backstage?
Me: Fuck no! Get away from me before I burn you with my cigarette.
Groupie: *finally stumbles away from me and unto unsuspecting male hipster who is too dumb to realize she will give him herpes*
Me: *takes deep breath. forces smile. pretends to finish enjoying kaiser chiefs*